Global conspiracies are everywhere.
If you ever find you're being followed by a man in a snappy heather grey wool sweater and flannel lined khakis, please contact the authorities. They may be after your SEO knowledge to use it against their enemies.
I find it highly unlikely that will happen, though. So enjoy the slippers.
By
G-Rob, at
6:14 AM, January 31, 2006
rude j.w.s! no soup for you.
By 
, at
6:48 PM, January 28, 2006
holy shit, have you ever read amalah.com? it's like a whole world.
By , at
9:38 PM, January 29, 2006
Hmm, anonymous blog comment spam...
it's like a whole world.
And articulate, too.
Thanks anon, but it'll be a LONG while before I feel the need to start reading "I'm a mommy, read about junior's poo and stuff, it's the best poo EVAR" blogs.
...with perhaps the exception of people I know who have squeezed one out already.
By
Kat, at
1:28 PM, January 30, 2006
Postscript: In fact, I have seen Amalah's site before, a long time ago. And it is a good blog. I just don't appreciate the off-topic anonymous comment promoting it. It's rude. And while Amalah may be the most articulate baby-blogger ever, I am completely uninterested in pregnancy and infant-rearing myself and therefore don't want to read about it. Unless, as I said, it's a story from someone I know firsthand.
By
Kat, at
2:04 PM, January 30, 2006
Perhaps it's just me, but I always wish that Role Players actually had our own propaganda that we could leave. Like a "join the wonders of a fantasy world" or somesuch. I oughta make it, save I don't have the Photoshop skills. I'll get Paul to do it maybe. Imagine though how those people'd feel if they saw that on their doorstep after leaving their own propaganda. Equal opportunity. ;)
-Charles
By
Cad, at
4:52 PM, January 30, 2006
Dude! Amalah rox!
By , at
9:54 PM, January 30, 2006
When I role play, I am a wicked ass, card carrying member of the JW's. I am known as "The Elder" and have ammassed +25 dexterity and +35 experience over the past month by leaving leaflets on the banisters in public stairwells all over the city.
My weapon is my leaflet. By way of severe paper cut or intellectual bludgeoning, I will convert you one way or another.
The Elder
Brought to you by the JW's where our motto is: "I seen 'im....seriously."
By
G-Rob, at
7:01 AM, January 31, 2006
Kat, I post a message to my website www.lettersneversent.com. Not a plug (well, sorta), but it is a great way to get things off your chest. Try it, its theraputic. First time checking out your blog - will be back. Cheers!
By
Pete Czech, at
6:10 PM, January 26, 2006
This is a tough situation, as we have previously discussed. I've already told you what I think would be best: write a sincere, understanding email that reiterates empowering the individual and making the best decisions for themselves. You can't control the situation at all, but at least you can bring up your concerns, as any true friend should do.
By
Rachel, at
7:12 PM, January 26, 2006
This is always a tough situation. There's no easy litmus test, and saying anything has the potential to backfire on you, damaging your relationship with said person(s). In the interest of brevity, here's my proposed test:
Why is the marriage a bad idea?
--If the answer is "the marriage will be a failure", then you have no right to intervene. MYOFB.
--If the answer is "the marriage will lead to a verbal/mental abusive situation", then you may have a right to intervene gently, but intervention is unlikely to matter worth beans. MYOFB.
--If the answer is "the marital contract is being entered into under coercion", then you may have a right to intervene gently.
--If the answer is "the marriage is being entered into on false pretenses (i.e. he's really been unfaithful, etc.)", then you have a right to intervene, and the other party has a right to know.
--If the answer is "the marriage will set up a physically abusive situation", then you have a responsibility to intervene.
That, friends, is my metric that I made up off the top of my head.
By
Cory P., at
12:05 AM, January 27, 2006
Also useful, use a straight-up risk-to-benefit ratio. Will the risk to your friendship be worth it for the projected outcomes?
By
Cory P., at
12:07 AM, January 27, 2006
I think Rachel said everything I was thinking on. It depends on the situation. If your friend is getting married for the wrong reasons, not your business. If your friend is going to be in physical danger, your business.
By
Lazy Lightning, at
4:46 AM, January 27, 2006
If you don't support the marriage, then you can express that by just not attending the wedding.
By , at
5:20 AM, January 27, 2006
Generally speaking, adults are free to enter into whatever sort of relationship they find most comforting and enjoyable. Even if they find the marriage a soul-sucking wander through a Hell of self-recrimination and regret, they must have been seeking *some* comfort from the decision.
Perhaps I'm not the best source of advice, given my track record. I still believe in the idea of marriage, or at least mutually satisfactory up-shacking, but I think that it's often viewed as the only "moral" way to cohabitate, and that people who are assuredly ill-suited to one another (or to anyone, in some cases) bind their lives prematurely, setting up deeper and longer lasting angst for the future.
I say, Shack Up! After 5 years or so, if you still love the person despite their (by now readily apparent) faults, then ring it up.
Now. . . should you tell someone that they are making a mistake? Depends on how in love they are with their partner, how close they are to you, and your reasons for making your feelings known. Generally being supportive (beforehand, during the giddy hormone rush of unalloyed joy, and afterwards, during the despondent self-recriminating angst-fest of breakup) is the right thing to do.
By
, at
11:02 AM, January 27, 2006
I'm with Rachel (and etc.)
Sometimes the bounds of propriety come second.
By , at
12:08 PM, January 27, 2006
Thanks for your comments everyone. Let's narrow it down a bit to three situations:
1) S/he is SO wrong for you!
2) S/he is/has been unfaithful to you!
3) S/he worries me because s/he seems dangerous to your physical/mental well-being.
YES or NO to interference (on a commentary level) to each of these situations?
By
Kat, at
12:17 PM, January 27, 2006
1.) No.
2.) Yes.
3.) Yes, depending on the severity of physical well-being.
Cory: nice flow chart, you summed up exactly what I wanted to say.
By
Rachel, at
12:34 PM, January 27, 2006
I am going to completely fail to give you the binary answers you want, sorry ;p
1) It would depend greatly on how close you are to the person. Most people have concerns before getting married. If it is something that, based on the nature of your relationship with the person, you would normally be able to discuss with them, then go for it. At least let your misgivings be known. It can be very helpful for your confidence to know whether your friend has thought about the same things that trouble you. Of course, if you don't know the person as well, it isn't really your place to comment.
2) Probably good to let them know, but... make sure that A) the person doesn't already know and has intentionally overlooked/ forgiven the unfaithfulness, and B) be absolutely sure that you are correct that the fiancee actually has been cheating.
3) Much the same as #1 for mental well-being. In cases of physical abuse should always step in, even if you aren't an extremely close friend. Messy territory though, a direct approach isn't likely to work if the person is already putting up with this kind of treatment.
By
, at
1:37 PM, January 27, 2006
I would have to say another thing to consider is how well you know BOTH parties, and how sure you are of the situation/reason they shouldn't be getting married. There is nothing more hurtful to a friendship, than hearing someone you trusted tell you not to marry someone, when you know damn well that they don't know your relationship well enough to have any basis for the statement. (but of course, they think they do...and therefore won't listen to your defense.) hope that helps from another perspective.
By
, at
2:35 PM, January 27, 2006
Pete: Thanks for visiting! I think I've seen your site before and I may use it in the future. Good idea, too. :-)
§: I'm not sure how effective a form of protest this is for someone in my demographic. For one, I don't know many people who follow traditional wedding etiquette. Second, as someone who doesn't have an established income, attending every wedding everywhere isn't possible anyway, especially because I'm at that age when so many of my friends are being wed in rapid sucession.
BossMan: In general, I agree with you here. In some situations, however, I might worry about a person's ability to escape a marraige (for personal reasons or external circumstances) should it fail the litmus test and things become bad.
Eight 1/2 tails: Yeah, there are some people who are prone to rational discussion about their relationships, like you and I... and some who are not. The other major point in this discussion, which I'm not even touching for reason of length is WHAT approach one should take if commenting on marraige. What works? What doesn't work?
Emi: Good point, because in most situations I doubt someone would know both parties equally well, though it is possible. I've had parents be unsupportive of a relationship, but never really friends. I'm guessing you're speaking from personal experience. What do you say to that?
By
Kat, at
3:41 PM, January 27, 2006
Yes, Kat, I am speaking from personal experience. Well, parents' lack of support falls into a sort of understandable (to a certain degree) area...especially if you are living at home with them. They are just looking out for what they *think* is best for their baby. At a certain point though, they do need to realize that their "baby" is an adult and is going to make his/her own decisions. This whole thing makes it hard for the kid to accept the parent's opinion just because they are the parent.
As for friends, I don't have any problems there. Mainly where my above comment was coming from was with regard to family members who are peers, and think they can take the freedom to judge a relationship as a parent would. Again, they have little contact with the relationship on which to base their opinions. In those cases, I think the person should just keep their mouth shut.
By
, at
2:16 PM, January 30, 2006
Yah, I think it's definitely best to give a kid enough rope to hang themselves with. That's been Justin's parents' philosophy and (more recently) mine.
I get the overall impression from everyone's responses that, outright meddling aside, there are appropriate and inappropriate instances in which to attempt to dissuade someone.
With so many people I know marrying in the recent past or future, and likely myself included, 'tis good to know what people think. Now, if only I'd asked this before RacheMicah got married. I would have tried harder instead of keeping my mouth shut! ;-)
By
Kat, at
2:28 PM, January 30, 2006
Yeek. I weighed in on this one a touch late, but my opinion nonetheless:
1. In the situation where I thought the person was wrong for the other on a fundamental level, I would probably try to explore their reasoning for getting married. I don't think I could do too much in this situation to make a difference, but I'd at least sound things out in the event that the person picked up on any gaps just through being asked.
2. Unfaithfulness is a dealbreaker, in my opinion. If the person doesn't know about it, I would think twice about what the marriage means to them before saying something. That being said, a bridge on an unstable foundation...or somesuch. I'd probably give in and tell them unless I was sworn to uber secrecy on the matter. Been there before...*sighs*
3. Dangerous to physical and mental well being? If this person is any friend of mine, it's worthy of an intervention of sorts. Maybe not like a call them out and force them to hear my perspective kinda thing, but I've never been good at leaving that sorta thing alone. In the long run if they are that dangerous, even if the friend gets mad at you, it's worthy that you tried.
But I'm usually too opinionated. ;)
-Charles
By
Cad, at
4:47 PM, January 30, 2006
Great theatre review! Yer published, woo hoo!
By Rachel, at
4:47 PM, January 25, 2006
Congratulations!
By , at
1:30 AM, January 26, 2006
tell her to do adopt one of the many thousands of needy and discarded.
By , at
12:01 AM, January 24, 2006
Please name yourself when you leave comments, anonymous commenting is rude. (Choose "other" from the options in the comment box.)
She *could* do that, but it is no more my place to tell her what to do than to tell someone they shouldn't get an abortion. It's her choice and she's doing what she feels is right for her. That's good enough for me.
By
Kat, at
2:35 PM, January 25, 2006
wow, those guys look like total nerds. (except for the guy in the glasses /white shirt / black jacket, standing, in the first pic). they must have been drooling all over you something awful.
By
, at
9:34 PM, January 23, 2006
Eh. *shrug* They're total geeks, for sure. Nerds, I can't say. Either way, I'm used to the crowd.
By Kat, at
2:33 PM, January 25, 2006
Albany's nice. We lived in Victor (Suburb of Rochester) for 5 years of my childhood. My grandmother lives in Auburn and my Aunt and Uncle in Newark. (So I've got peeps in upstate NY!) It's a beautiful area.. but can be messy this time of year with slush! Have fun!!
By
Lazy Lightning, at
7:54 PM, January 16, 2006
duuuuude. wear something hot.
By , at
9:33 PM, January 16, 2006
happy travels, business woman!
By Rachel, at
10:50 AM, January 17, 2006
I'm sorry we won't be seeing you-- if they send you again, put some extra time on one end or the other and have a visit!
Also, don't forget warm clothes-- were're having a 'mild' spell, but that still means cold!
My security word is cyurvd. Which is a good word.
Um... holy crap!
Banzai!
By Cory P, at
10:28 PM, January 15, 2006
Wow, so THAT'S how it happens...
Everything is much more clear to me now!
By , at
4:55 PM, January 16, 2006
that makes me never want to have sex again.
By , at
7:13 PM, January 16, 2006
Well, then Planned Parenthood's mission is surely accomplished, Anon!
By Kat, at
7:19 PM, January 16, 2006
that's a good freakin' point!! =-)
By , at
9:33 PM, January 16, 2006
hahaha!
By Rachel, at
10:49 AM, January 17, 2006
I think there are some other subtle bits to this video that you may not have picked up on.
Planned Parenthood has the budget to hire Michael Chiklis (a la The Shield) for a pregnancy video?
Why use a circumsized penis wearing a leisure suit and not one with a big turtle neck on?
Did you notice the vulva's hair on her head doesn't match the hair on her coat? Hmmmmm.
Guys take note, heart-shaped box of candy beats flowers anytime. I'll have to remember that one.
By
G-Rob, at
7:34 AM, January 31, 2006
Here's some info on the spam.
Joe is a "very enthusiastic person, who wants everybody to be happy."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gouranga
By
AltherrWeb, at
9:48 AM, January 13, 2006
He must really want me to be happy, because I just got spammed again.
*lolz*
By Kat, at
10:43 AM, January 13, 2006
Hooray! A shogatsu (New Year's) package just arrived from my host family in Tokyo. In it, a slew of Tonari no Totoro goodies that ya can't find here in the states...i personaly like the "man hater" and "burning romance" undies... good stuff.
By
Bewyldered, at
1:05 AM, January 11, 2006
Yes that place was awesome! It consumed much of my hard won Japanese currency. Too much. Heheh.
By , at
11:05 AM, January 11, 2006
is that thing a penguin?
By , at
3:09 PM, January 11, 2006
No, a Totoro is a...totoro. It's not a stylized other animal. (Kat wants me to type that it is a mammal that lives in the brush, it eats leaves and greens and is magical...that clarify?)\
-Justin
By
, at
8:28 PM, January 11, 2006
Does Totoro have any hobbies? Like does it do anything cool?
By , at
10:45 PM, January 11, 2006
Totoros enjoy gardening and dancing. The biggest ones seem to be able to fly...
they're like snuggly forest spirits ^_^
(though they're fictional, not traditional characters)
By
Kat, at
12:36 AM, January 12, 2006
that's really funny.
hey who'd you consolidate with? my company is cool but they're bad with paperwork. as in, i want a hard copy record of all this shit (onlin debits) once in a while!! i have to call them for it.
By
, at
4:33 PM, January 08, 2006
You do realize this is the US Government you're talking about. Efficiency is not their middle name.
By Louie, at
11:42 PM, January 08, 2006
Especially asstastic since the postage rate just went up to $39 cents.
By Peter, at
12:01 AM, January 09, 2006
I consolidated through NelNet, and I don't think they send statements for autopay either. I don't mind, though, I'm tired of recycling needless paper bills for things I can verify in my online bank statement. :)
Peter: I'm lucky, I don't have to pay for stamps-- Justin's work does it for me!
By
Kat, at
9:23 AM, January 09, 2006
Sorry to hear your story was killed. The publication I'm involved with nixed one of my articles last month but didn't offer any compensation. Then, low and behold, what arrived in my mailbox this week? An incredibly high cell phone bill, which can partially be blamed on the interviews I conducted for the article during business hours. If you're gonna freelance, use a land line. Words to live by.
By
Brandon, at
5:32 PM, January 09, 2006
Try writing for a locally owned, non-sucky publication and maybe you'll have better luck. Best wishes.
By , at
1:16 PM, January 12, 2006
I tried that-- they weren't hiring.
In truth, I like both the Weekly and the Stranger... but the guys at The Stranger have for some reason always been dicks to me. The tremendous disregard with which they treat applicants is amazing.
Though the Weekly was, effectively, bought out, their staff has been courteous, engaging, and personal. I don't hold it against them for killing the story... part of the reason was that I didn't have time to pursue it.
By
Kat, at
1:22 PM, January 12, 2006
I've have some pretty nasty experiences applying for internships and positions at the Portland Mercury, which is owned by the same company as the Stranger. While they haven't been outright cruel, they're indifferent to say the least.
And they're not nearly as nasty as the Oregonian. In the world of NW media, their hiring department seems to consider themselves the local equivalent of admissions at Oxford.
By
, at
4:32 PM, January 12, 2006
The photo above looks vaguely like you've caught Justin doing something obscene... peeing over the railing, or possibly ON Micah...
By
inkandpen, at
7:25 AM, January 07, 2006
that pix of you and justin in the mexican restaurant is adorable.
By , at
5:38 PM, January 08, 2006
It always seemed to me that nipple piercings would be hard to heal. That's amazing how fast they're closing up!
By
Lazy Lightning, at
5:07 AM, January 05, 2006
I was surprised, especially because I had no problems with my bellybutton piercing and I messed with that *all the time.* I never even *touched* these outside from morning and night, when I cleaned them. Oh well... I look forward to having my boobies back.
By
Kat, at
9:12 AM, January 05, 2006
Happy 2006! At least you got your first barf of the year over with early.
Here's to 2006 weddings? eh? eh?
By
Adrienne, at
11:13 AM, January 03, 2006
And my first hangover...
heh
Well, if/when the wedding happens, it won't be at least until 2007. I plan to take my sweet time working out the nitty gritty. :-)
By
Kat, at
11:39 AM, January 03, 2006
Albany, eh? Not that you'll have time, but if you'd like to see our snowy retreat, it's not that far...
By inkandpen, at
11:42 AM, January 03, 2006
Argh! I should have thought of that...
I don't know if it's feasible because I don't have a rental car or leisure time. Dammit!
By Kat, at
11:46 AM, January 03, 2006
Rest at ease: the Talking Rain that you accidetally sprayed in the car was just spring water, not carbonation with fruit juice extracts.
And wasn't the day after our wedding your first hangover, if I remember correctly? ;)
We had so much fun at Orcas, wewt!
By
Rachel, at
11:06 PM, January 03, 2006
Ahh, I thought it was Talking Rain brand spring water. :-)
And no, my first hangover wasn't your wedding, but long before! That was just the first really SHITTY hangover I've had. And this was just my first hangover of 2006... I'm sure there will be more to follow.
Glad you had fun! ^_^
By
Kat, at
11:15 PM, January 03, 2006
fotos? =-(
By , at
2:56 PM, January 04, 2006
do you find your japanese has gone to shit or do you keep up on it?
By , at
4:51 PM, January 04, 2006
Hey, that's a pretty good TOri Amos song.
By , at
7:21 PM, January 04, 2006
My name is Janice Still and i would like to show you my personal experience with Depo-Provera.
I am 24 years old. I have been on Depo for 9 years and did not realize that the symptoms I experienced might be related to the shot. I am now facing thousands of dollars in dental work due to bone density loss, and will probably end up with osteoporosis. I am getting off Depo and will never touch it again!
I have experienced some of these side effects-
Low libido, joint pain, bone density loss, dental problems, headaches, fatigue, out of control eating, gained 40 lbs., depression
I hope this information will be useful to others,
Janice Still
By
Depo-Provera Prescription Information, at
5:31 AM, October 27, 2008
Wedding Madness
October 2005
Our wedding blog!
Feedburner
