The moment I registered that he might not be able to find it, I asked Justin if he thought I should help. It was dark (10:40pm) on poorly lit street with a crosswalk completely torn up by construction.
Before I go on, I'll admit something right off-- I'm terrified of blind people. Not because they're disabled (I think they can get around better than I can sometimes) but because I'm afraid that I'll somehow offend if I offer to help. Even Erik Weihenmayer's inspirational book about being a blind mountainclimber, Touch the top of the World, is filled with his accounts of well-meaning but overbearing offers. I would have felt like shit if I'd looked the other way and this guy walked into traffic (again, construction, no crosswalk, nothing) and I was going to feel like a douche if I offended him by meaning well. We pulled over the car.
I asked the man if he was looking for the crosswalk and he said yes, he wanted to cross 45th to walk down Wallingford street. I got out of the car and told him he was heading in the right direction but the crosswalk was still a bit farther. Once he got there, I told him that the light would change soon and he'd be going down Wallingford if he headed straight. In retrospect, I probably should have waited until the light changed and walked across the street with him, then gotten back in the car, but I got back in the car and we pulled up to the intersection again.
So, of course, he was still standing there on the sidewalk and the walk signal came on, and he didn't know it. I'd been feeling sympathetic to that point (not pity really, but how much I know I'd feel awkward in the same situation) but that was when it really hit me how much it would be terrifying to be blind. It occurred to me that not only was there no auditory cue for him to cross the street, but there was also no crosswalk (the lines are typically raised) to indicate where he was going. The street is full of cracks and gravel, and completely uneven in places.
We were sitting right there, so I opened the window and, feeling kind of embarrassed, told him "Oh, you can cross now, but when you do, just be really careful because the street is all munched up." So he crossed, having to avoid the car in front of us which was idling where the crosswalk was supposed to be, and by the time he got to the other side he was off center and had to turn around a couple times after almost walking east on 45th before he got re-oriented.
I feel stupid for not realizing these things and telling him sooner. I also feel silly for even saying anything at all. I'm sure he would have figured it out eventually. But I know if it were me in his place I'd like a helping hand more than I'd like to be fumbling around at an intersection in the dark.
I feel shaken now, in some ways because I'm hyper-aware of my uncertainty and wish I knew how to react. Some of me wanted to shrug or flee the scene, "it's not my business." But the greater part wanted to make sure he was OK even after we left. I wish I knew, just for a second, what was going on in his head... how he was feeling, and what to do. I'm shaken, too, because he was like us, so young, and experiencing the world in a way I could never imagine.
I feel so real now, but so very off balance. I hope he found his way to where he was going. It's good to be home.
Posted on May 14, 2007 @ 10:43 PM | 5 comments
Comments:
kat - i ran into this situation recently in the south lake union area and basically grabbed the persons arm (in a non-threatening manner) and told them that due to construction and the fact that I personally felt it was an unsafe condition the city had placed this individual in at that time - I asked if they wouldn't mind if I helped them through a potentially dangerous intersection. The person responded in a 100% positive manner. Don't hesitate to help. These citizens appreciate it and will tell you when and if they do not want/need your assistance.
By 
espresso...yum, at
11:03 PM, May 15, 2007
"But I know if it were me in his place I'd like a helping hand more than I'd like to be fumbling around at an intersection in the dark."
Um, I don't think it really matters to him that it's dark...he's blind.
By 
, at
1:41 PM, May 17, 2007
That it was dark might not matter to him but it certainly matters in the context of the situation. You might also want to take into account that he could have been *partially* sighted and therefore at a significant disadvantage because it was night.
Don't be a smartass, it goes poorly with internet anonymity.
By Kat, at
1:48 PM, May 17, 2007
"Um, I don't think it really matters to him that it's dark...he's blind."
I would imagine that if you cannot see, then your whole world is some kind of "darkness". (Or lightness, truth is, I don't know what blind people experience, but I would think of it as being quite dark.) That, I believe, is what she meant by that statement. It's called com-pre-hen-sion. Big word, I know, but still an important one.
By lazylightning, at
2:02 PM, May 17, 2007
lazylightning,
Sorry love. It may be convenient to assume I'm an idiot an completely unable to appreciate the deep, symbolic meaning behind "darkness." Alas, I'll try to clarify the author's intent for you by citing a passage a bit earlier in the post:
"It was dark (10:40pm) on poorly lit street with a crosswalk completely torn up by construction."
I'm quite certain that by darkness she actually meant the absence of light (literal light, not the blinding rays of your immortal soul filling the world with joy).
Cheers!
By , at
2:52 PM, May 17, 2007
