Numine.com
Getting Pumped
by Kat
I exercise at a small gym right underneath my work. It's just bare necessities-- free weights, machines, and some uninspiring cardio equipment-- but at $25 a month, the price is right. I'm in there three times a week, lifting weights, and there's just one problem... it's impossible to get pumped listening to Oldies. They have some sort of satellite radio system installed but it's always pumping out either reggae or classic shoo-bop oldies. I bring my iPod, but unfortunately most of the free-weight equipment I use is directly under a drop-ceiling speaker which is louder than anything I can play without paining myself. I just really can't get that needed boost of rage when listening to He's a Rebel underneath my techno track.

I mean, at least this gym isn't populated by scores of underdressed sorostitutes burning off the only calories they'll consume that day by hopping effortlessly on eliptical trainers. There are only a few patrons who annoy me, and for entirely different reasons that I'm not going to get into. I'd rather let go of my needless spite for them and let them continue to be poorly trained by the meathead instructor. It just hurts to watch.

And there's another thing, too. The gym staff seems to have a philanthropic bent. On more than one occasion I've seen a poster advertising group activities to benefit the homeless. In fact, there's one in the bathroom right now. The body of the poster is normal enough: "Two chances to feed the homeless with us on Tuesday April 18 and Tuesday April 25th." It's the headline that gets me. Right next to a clip art image of a fancy waiter, towel over arm, serving a businessman at a sidewalk cafe, is the large block text, "HOMELESS FEEDING."

Posted on April 17, 2006 @ 11:20 AM | 2 comments

Comments:

"HOMELESS FEEDING."

... really? really? wow.

i can't wait until the summer when the sorostitutes and their man meat all leave the SRC. botha', botha', botha'.

By Anonymous Rachel, at 1:15 PM, April 17, 2006  

What's wrong with underdressed sorostitutes?!?

By Anonymous Justin, at 2:05 PM, April 17, 2006  

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